What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Make Nazis afraid again!

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Do snipers lay on top of tank turrets during combat?

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Why do wokes use words like "homophobes" when they don't know what that means? Do they realize that no one is afraid of them?

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Why are girls supposed to have a stereotypical "hourglass" body shape, and why if you dont have an "hourglass" body shape you get treated differently? It doesnt make any sense to me.

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Delta Force selection is originally based on SAS selection, so why is there no brutal jungle phase for Delta Force? It seems like it's based only on the Brecon Beacons section.

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Jenny from Perth writes – my partner is the life of the party, women and men adore him. But at home, he gets angry at us for the silliest reasons and never nice words me or our kids, always putting us down. Should I stay or leave him?

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

TEXT:

What are some funny and smart quotes?

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

How can I get a girlfriend? I am 26.

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

What baseball stories from the early days of the sport seem too bizarre to be true?

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

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I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Amazon knocks up to 50% off Garmin watches — here are 15 deals worth shopping now - Tom's Guide

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Do you believe that social media companies should allow posts spreading misinformation about election results, as suggested by Rep. Jim Jordan?

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.